JAE FEVER

Ambitious. Delicious. Seditious.

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    When, in a drinking session, someone suddenly tells you, “your naivete is what I love the most about you” it makes you stop and think. Especially when you’ve been, of late, trying to pass yourself off to those who don’t know better as a world-wise twenty-something sophisticate, right at home in a generation that thinks cynicism is chic. So I’m naïve. I believe in being part of a struggle much bigger than yourself; daring to reach for a heaven far beyond your grasp; doing your part to assuage wounds wrought by many lifetimes of strife and knowing that it will take double that number of lifetimes to completely heal. I can look every bully in the eye and I know I will not flinch. Very few things threaten me – probably more the result of the brashness of youth than the wisdom of years. I think the best kind of job is not the job that gets you a fat paycheck or gives you generous car plan. It’s the job that makes you sleep well at night and eager to get up the next day. I love knowing that I’m working with the good guys – and drinking with them later at night. I believe that the fire in my belly can quell the butterflies in my tummy, and that my phantoms are no match for my passions. I maintain that the Left is right (but also that social justice is impossible without procedural due process). I believe in love, purely and utterly: insisting on it, finding it, keeping it, allowing yourself to be swept off your feet by the violence of its current but at the same time rocked to gentle sleep in the constancy of its embrace. I believe in the certainty and constancy of my friendships. I believe I’m fabulous and beautiful, and if you don’t agree with me, that’s because you’re wrong. I would say I believe in a Higher Being that holds everything together, and allows us to find that glint of light amidst hunger and cancer and injustice and oppression —- But then, that’s not naivete anymore. That’s faith.

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Archive for August 22nd, 2007

Happy 10,000th Blog Hit To Me

Posted by Jae on August 22, 2007

I don’t have a preoccupation with numbers, I don’t aspire to be the Filipino blog with the most hits (that would be my friend, Josel, heehee) and I’m still too anti-social to join blog communities — but I’m in the mood to celebrate this blog milestone. I celebrated my first 1,ooo hits so why not 10,000?

Of course, the surge in blog hits has been aided in no small measure by the frenzy over Malu Fernandez and a lot of people have been going to my blog not to read my stuff but to read the People Asia articles. While I’m happy to join my voice to the hundreds of outraged voices against snobbery and bigotry, I couldn’t help but feel a tad self-conscious that these “hundreds of outraged voices” would also read about my failed foray into meditation, or my feeble flirtation skills.

But, well, on second thought, who bloody cares? Certainly not the girl who fell on her butt before a throng of people while racing to catch the MRT, and who accidentally spilled champagne over the Prime Minister of Australia because her stilletos were too wobbly?

Panalo. Wecome to my world.

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